still.

Still.

This word, “still”, was my word of the year for 2015. As I reflect back on 2015 and this year, I want to share with you some of the things the Lord has taught me.

For a busy person like me, always on the go, “still” was not the easiest word to learn. And if I’m going to be honest, a year later after choosing the word, I still have not conquered it. Sometimes I even feel that I failed at learning it.

My theme verse for the year was Psalm 46:10, “Be still and know that I am God…”

It seemed that this verse popped up EVERYWHERE. I think the coolest story of this verse is when my mom gave me a necklace for graduation with the verse on it, and I had not even told her that “still” was my word for the next year. It was a confirmation from the Lord of my word! He’s in the smallest details of life. He is so good.

When looking at “still,” what does it mean? It means to let go, to release. “Be still and know that I am God…” Release and let God be control. Sit in His presence, knowing that He is God. He has your life in the palm of His hands. In our everyday life, it’s easy to lose sight of who He is. We try to go go go and to do things on our own. We forget that He knows what He is doing, and He has a divine plan for you and for me.

This past year has been full of many ups and downs. I’ve been in the valley, and I’ve been on top of the mountain.

For a quick overview of what this past year held for me: I transitioned from being a student to the real world. I was Campus Missionary at Houston Baptist University, I lost my grandpa who was my role model and hero, I won Miss HBU and a President’s Award, I led a team to Beach Reach, I got to be a chaperone on a mission trip to Jamaica, the Lord led me to be a missions intern at Kingsland Baptist Church, I was a chaperone on a mission trip to Arlington, I was in two weddings this summer, I got to attend a wedding in Costa Rica, my cousin got married, I was asked to be in two weddings for 2016, one of my best friends found out she is pregnant, I broke up with my boyfriend, I’m watching my grandma deal with Alzheimer’s in a nursing home, I have been dealing with several health issues, I would listen to so many lies from the enemy that I would slip back into my depression, I started working with a doctor to start a refugee clinic, I have been tutoring an Afghani family that I absolutely adore, I started babysitting for a family that welcomed me in with open arms, and through out the year I have met so many new people and friends it’s unbelievable.

This might have been more than you wanted to know, but God has taught me so much through all of this. I’m so overwhelmed with the opportunities that He has given me this past year, that it’s hard to believe He would let me do such things. He’s been teaching me to be still in knowing who He is. He knows my thoughts and my fears. He knows that sometimes I struggle with being single. He knows I want to have a family one day, so it’s hard to wait. He knows that I miss my grandpa every single day. He knows that I struggle with anxiety. And He knows who to put in my life, just at the right time.

I’m still learning to be still. It’s not easy to let go, but I have to remind myself that God knows best. He knows my future and where I’m going. He’s laying out my steps one by one. I might not understand what He is doing, but that’s okay, because He does.

This all leads me to my word for 2016, “wait.” This is a scary word to learn, but I can already see why the Lord has pointed me to this word. I’m a little worried but also excited for what I’m going to learn from the Lord in 2016. I just need to be still, and allow Him to be in control. I need to sit in His presence, knowing who He is.

So, I want to challenge you. Are you being still? What are your fears? What are you having a hard time letting go of? Are things so chaotic right now that you’ve lost sight of who is in control?

Take some time today and be still. Be still and release whatever you’re holding on to (I know it’s easier said than done, believe me). Give it to the One that is All-Knowing. Give it to the One who holds your future in His hands. And give it to the One that loves you constantly.

I pray that the year 2016 is the best one yet. I pray that the Lord teaches you and grows you. I pray that you fall more in love with the Savior of the World. And I pray that you let Him be in control. God bless.